How Felicity Finds

Author: faystephenson

  • 60 Ways To Improve Family Life in 60 Secs

    60 Ways To Improve Family Life in 60 Secs

    Meee in a Family Minute

    Family Support

    Sid Madge is the author of ‘Meee in a Family Minute’ and founder of The Meee Programme.  In 2009, Sid chose to relocate from London to a remote corner in North Wales and build a new business.  Running a workshop at a local school, Sid was shocked by the self-esteem of the students.  Asked to describe themselves, 15% used terms such as ‘freak’, ‘weirdo’ and ‘misfit’.  He felt urged to take action, and the Meee Programme was born.

    His first book, ‘Meee in a Minute – 60 ways to improve your life in 60 seconds’ has become a best-seller. It recognises and affirms the work of the Meee Programme, which encourages everyone to recognise and believe in their abilities. More and more in these unprecedented times, we are looking to rebalance our family lives and relationships. Could ‘Meee in a Family Minute’ provide some family support and do just that?

    Balancing Act

    I was sent an email in June asking if I would like to improve my work-life balance.  Now, anyone who knows me knows that I am passionate about family life and about wellbeing.  So it immediately grabbed my attention. ’60 Ways to Improve Your Family Life in 60 Seconds’ is the third in the series of ‘Meee in a Minute’ books from Sid Madge.

    I was very lucky to be gifted a copy of the book, and I have to say, as soon as I began reading, I knew this book was special.  I struggled to put down, but the fantastic thing is that each chapter literally takes less than a minute to read.  Therefore, you can make small changes with immediate effect. As with everything, rather than try to change lots at once, we need to walk before we run.  The book is full of useful tips and strategies to help with family support. To help engage with, enjoy and reconnect.  So as I read through, I marked the chapters I wanted to bring to our family life.  I then narrowed it down to my Top 5, which I am determined to work on over the summer with us all.

    As with everything, rather than try to change lots at once, we need to walk before we run.  The book is full of useful tips and strategies to help with family support. To help engage with, enjoy and reconnect.  So as I read through, I marked the chapters I wanted to bring to our family life.  I then narrowed it down to my Top 5, which I am determined to work on over the summer with us all.

    Our Top 5 Actions To Take

    1. Cut down on screen time – From Home School to Lockdown, it has increased the whole family’s screen time exponentially.  The holidays and relaxation in lockdown gave us the chance to cut back on our screen time as a family, but it’s hard not to fall back into the same old routine.
    2. Family Values – This is something really important to me, and I want the boys to have something visual, to reaffirm those values daily.
    3. Read Aloud to your kids – Cutting down on screen time allows us time to start reading more, too.  The older boys and I have a stack of books to get through this summer.  But for Samuel with his Dyslexia, it’s not so easy.  Reading aloud to him will hopefully give him that love of reading and encourage him with his reading.
    4. Play Together – We cracked on with this last night after ordering more shuttlecocks (Daisy keeps eating them).  The Badminton tournament is going strong.  Just seeing all the boys playing out in the garden happily together was lovely.  After tea, Monopoly came out, and a request for UNO to be played tonight! A great start,
    5. Be The Change – I think being stuck at home has made me more aware of how my personal behaviour affects the boys.  My anxiety about lockdown has poured over into angry outbursts and a feeling of loss of control.  In Sam, I can see some of those traits in him.  I need to be the change…

    ‘Little Bible of Goodness’

    This Pocket-sized book is jam-packed full of actionable family support to enable you to use now, or simply to read through and realise that, actually, even in the madness of lockdown, you are doing a good job! But we should never stop learning, just as our children don’t.  This book is perfect for those times when you are a little unsure. When you know you want to make a change or help, but aren’t quite sure how to do it best. Or one of your kids needs a little more support.  From chapters on ‘Family Time’ or ‘Don’t Take it Personally’ to ‘No Regrets’ or ‘Never Criticise’, it really does manage to cover everything.  I would thoroughly recommend and have just ordered the previous two books in the series.

    If you are interested in learning more about the Programme and what it can do for you, your colleagues, or students, then please check it out.  Fascinating read…

    I’ll keep you posted on how our small changes go over the next few weeks.  I’d love to hear if you read and what you think.  Or what you’d love to develop within your family this summer!  Comment below.

    Fay x

  • Sleep Hygiene – What is it?

    Sleep Hygiene – What is it?

    I don’t think I’m the only person in the world who hadn’t heard of sleep hygiene when it was initially mentioned; in fact, I know I’m not. So just what exactly is it?

    In a nutshell, Sleep Hygiene is the practice of establishing routines conducive to better sleep.  However, it’s not just about your bedtime routine; it’s about your whole day. Start the day off right. Be mindful throughout the day. Take time to relax on an evening and wind down before bed. These all help to ensure that you get a good night’s sleep.

    Morning

    Set an alarm

    So it seems pretty obvious, but with more and more of us being able to work from home now, maybe we’ve let this slip.  Consistent waking times not only help regulate your bedtime but also “set” the body clock.

    Get some daylight

    Getting outside in natural light as soon as possible can really help to shake off any groggy feelings you may have. Read this great article by the Sleep Foundation about the connection between light and sleep. For my 5 top tips to improve your mood daily, read my previous blog post.

    Day

    Get some exercise

    Regular exercise can help you sleep more deeply at night and deliver a host of other health benefits.  So whether it’s walking the dog, going for a run or a session at the gym, it all helps.  Best to leave at least 2 hours after exercise before bed, though, to help your body relax again and return to its core temperature.

    Limit that caffeine

    Avoid drinks containing caffeine from the afternoon onwards.  Caffeine is a stimulant, which means if you drink too much, you can’t relax properly, even if you want to. Well, unless you have ADHD, but that’s a whole other post.  And remember, caffeine is found in some fizzy juices, energy drinks, and chocolate, as well as tea and coffee.

    Evening

    Limit alcohol/nicotine

    Try as much as possible to limit alcohol and nicotine in the evening.  Alcohol may help you get to sleep, but it doesn’t last and can lead to restless sleep through the night.  Likewise, Nicotine as a stimulant might make it harder for you to get to sleep when you need to.

    Watch what you eat and drink

    It is a good idea not to go to bed either hungry or thirsty, as it may cause you to wake in the night.  Conversely, going to bed on a full stomach isn’t good either, as your body can still be digesting or needing the toilet as you are trying to sleep

    Limit those screens

    It is a good idea to take some time out (30-60 mins) before bed, as screens are a mental stimulant.  The blue light emitted by our devices can reduce melatonin levels and prevent us from switching off.  Time for reading! Also, if you find your mind racing with thoughts, keep a pad and pen by your bed to jot them down and free your mind.

    Night

    Bedroom Environment

    A calm and restful bedroom is a must for a good night’s sleep. Ensure the temperature is cool and blinds/curtains are drawn.  Lighting should be dimmed and switched off to sleep. Weighted blankets are great for those who struggle with restless sleep. Delicate scents such as lavender are fantastic for calming the brain before sleep. I use This Works Sleep Plus Pillow Spray, which I adore.

    Remove or hide clocks

    If possible, clocks shouldn’t be in the bedroom to prevent clock-watching. If your alarm is a clock alarm, then try turning it away from you.  If you use your phone, ensure it is on sleep mode so as not to disturb you during the night

    How’s your sleep?

    So there you go, that’s sleep hygiene in a nutshell.  To be fair, if you are like me, you do quite a lot of it without even thinking.  Other parts I’ve really worked on since the New Year, so for me, this is something that I have been doing religiously since then.  Whilst my sleep quality isn’t great at the moment, it is definitely not down to my sleep hygiene!  So do you practice sleep hygiene?  What are your top tips for a good night’s sleep? Or do you struggle with your sleep and need to introduce some of the above? Drop me a comment below, would love to hear from you.

    P.S.

    To the GP who couldn’t wait to get me off the phone, rather than take 2 minutes to talk to me and explain exactly what sleep hygiene was… I have now made an appointment with my original GP (who could probably do without this call, as she is just as busy as you) to explain that I have been following sleep hygiene for months now, and that is not what is needed to help my deteriorating sleep.